FOR BLOG: Gran Canaria region" "Made by canaries ".... I THINK ......... ESA Canary
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| This article is made by people of Islas Canarias (Made in the Canaries). The author suffers Canary syndrome using words, so if you do not know who Paulino Rivero Pepe Benavente or refrain reading it thoroughly. And if you are "Made in the Canary Islands", please not offend, this is just for one million ARALL. |
series of autonomous : |
islands near Morocco |
| | (Flag) | (Coat of Arms) | |
Motto: Do you know the joke about the gum? |
Hymn: "NOT THAT PRICE!" |
Languages: English sudaquizado , Silvo gum |
|
Country | Sudacalandia, but pulling in Africa. |
Capital | San Borondon | center
natives | Muyayos |
Full Size | pseudo-sudacas, and immigrants guiris |
Friendly: | De Africa and Latin America |
Enemy From | De Spain , and the first world in general |
| population of mentally retarded Plagued |
official Fiesta Carnival | gayers transvestites |
Leaders | Paulino Rivero and Hitler |
The Canary Islands are the dump Spain an African archipelago and underdeveloped Third, inhabited mainly by:
- asudacados European (and not just in accent ...), mainly English, but also live many Venezuelan and Cuban immigrants who have been (sub) developed a complex ludicrous Guanches.
- Africans arrive in waves of boats at the top of black and Moors.
- Also, here are raised and grown on a massive scale, a species / pest is in full swing in these islands: the odd jobs, also known as: poligonera , jarcoritos, coyos , chanos, or mascachapas chandaleros (the latter for the Goths), showing all the great intellectual and cultural development are the canaries.
New theories suggest that part of the population also has an extraterrestrial origin, as is clear in some especímedes dominant political class, as clever as their constituents. In fact, the Auditorio de Tenerife is actually of a spacecraft. Anthem
Canario:
'NO! What prices! "
-
~ Canario in Hiperdino
History
Typical satellite photo of Tenerife (My shit in Vinegar)
The aforementioned theory of Martian origin, succinctly stated as "pa me that came from the casalcoño" by Rodolfo Bethancourt Betanio / Betancor / Bethancour / Betancourt, is conventionally accepted by a scientific consensus based on honesty and how late it was doing. According to this, an alien race delayed an hour with the meridian of Madrid would run aground at the peak of Teide , enclave appreciated by the settlers because of its beautiful views and its emissions of sulfur and marijuana in toxic amounts. Soon, the enjoyment of these natural resources was overshadowed by the competition between members of the colony, who decided to dispute the ground in a bloody competition pulls break underwear and stepparents. This sport, deep-seated alien has almost completely lost today, and it remains only a much more coarse than have ever been seen in Canal Plus under the name of and where Lucha Canaria apparently chickens from each team have to avoid being propped up and despadrados. The winning side kept its location at the top of the volcano while the losers were banished to Venezuela.
The surviving alien population lived a long period of calm through the Barrier Reef Canaria, also called small picture of the map, which effectively isolates the archipelago of any external influence. For nearly three centuries, sailors have been unable to push any commodity, subject only to reinforced concrete ( gofio ), tar ( barraquito ) vulcanized rubber (Jachia) and cutting gay fetish sweaty (fúrgol or furbo).
The scientific community differs, however, with regard to the long period entre la uniformización de la vestimenta -Era Taparrabense- y la independencia de la India -Guerras Sony -. Se sospecha que, llegado un momento, los sagaces godos se dieron cuenta de que la Barrera Coralina era una convención cartográfica y la aprovecharon para situar las Islas Canarias en el Mediterráneo , facilitando enormemente la conquista. Luego empezaron una campaña de aculturización consistente, en su mayor parte, en disparar a cualquiera que no supiese pronunciar "La barcaza del Zar zarpa en zigzag hacia Zanzíbar". Ello desató una reacción de los nativos, que ataban a una chumbera a cualquiera que tuviera dificultades en articular "chacho, or a pussy tiny chachi " (literally " are your perjúmenes woman that I sulibeyan ").
A minority school argues that relations between the conquerors and the natives quickly resulted in an agreement by which the Spaniards reserves the right political-economic-religious and the Islanders kept the monopoly painted in dumpsters . In any case, the political situation has remained unchanged to this day despite the demands for independence five hundred of extremist groups who are active in three hundred different people, among them Las Palmas is not La Palma, Godon Residencial Anaga Nation, Black Panthers Section Crafts, Gypsies Barcelonians Replaced 92, Vétete daqui, How Come With Peñita The Ihleta you Vah A Cagal, What Ehtár'Gofio Bueno and La Palma is not Las Palmas. you are going to laugh their fucking mother. Goths asker, motherfuckers
Geography
The archipelago is made up of seven major islands, several islets and a ghost island. The eastern islands, better known as the closest to Africa, are flatter, drier and less green. The other islands are mountainous, green and rarely reach boats (or barges), but the scandal is greater when they do. Now I get the canoes, so that the President of the Canary Islands has led to the King pleading for protection. Moreover, given the fact that the distances are on at all times, just ask any native for directions to corroborate this fact: a journey for any Goth can be ten minutes would be for a native or two hours two seconds, depends on the mood you caught. Weather
The islands closest to Africa, almost no rain, making residents stand to see the rain every time this circumstance occurs (thus demonstrating their high intellectual level), and rarely use umbrellas as they know it will not rain much. And if it's raining just leave it covered for walking short distances.
In islands where boats rarely come (some are, I swear), it rains more often, and the fact that they are mountain fuck makes everything whenever it is raining more than two hours, especially if made a road or a development in the middle of a ravine where the water was lower. When this happens, the news is full of people, mainly old, saying that such a catastrophe never happened before (so it is estimated that old canary, as well as bream, damselfish, mackerel and sardines, can not remember events beyond one year). Administration
is usual that everything is double in the Canaries and the Canaries have two official anthems and two autonomous community capital matching the capitals of the two provinces. The Canary Islands archipelago is divided into two provinces, they have three names: the canary the canary and the Goth officer, or name by which the inhabitants of the peninsula, have no idea what the official name, invent it, leaving it clear in the old license plates: GC and TF. These Goths do not distinguish between Las Palmas,
La Palma and Gran Canaria, and it is common that add to the Canaries Article LAS and it removed to the island of La Palma (Canary Islands and Palma ). To this must be added that the inhabitants of each province in turn alter the names of the other, to finish messing. Also, when referring to Las Palmas de Gran Canaria is often added to the last word is also the-s plural, so the adjective Much is lacking in conjunction with the accompanying noun, having to correct to Las Palmas on Grand Canary. Seeing that the result is shameful and disgrace oozing, change, and they say Las Palmas to dry.
The native population is mixed greatly with the foreign, out of anywhere, but ultimately suffers from a lack of color, especially for having so long been exposed to tourism German and English . In some areas, however, appear more tanned by dabbling with Moors.
Administration of the Canary Islands, other than a scam and I tell you, is: P
ROVINCE or the Canary Island of Las Palmas, depending on where you look
Officially called "Las Palmas" (local dialect LamParmah) and "Las Palmas de Gran Canaria" or " Gran Canaria "by the Goths. The islands of this province are:
Warren Island
Titerroigata or Also called Lanzarote. It is the easternmost island (everything has a certain air of China , the service time of premises that provide this environment is inverse to that given by the officials ), but not more close to Africa. Its inhabitants were the ability to drink salt water, feeding on lava, either solidified or current, and gorse (in dialect "julagas" ) when they ate the Guanches who originally populated the island. The flora of the island is composed of julagas, and there is a place called the grove with no more than 7 trees of no more than 1.8 meters in total. Among the fauna camels, formerly used for agriculture and today for the entertainment of tourists, either to ride and walk in them or to buy a few grams or pills rare. North of this island is the Chinijo Archipelago, composed of a few islands and La Graciosa As its name suggests is a gorgeous fat and salt, as some people thought it was an island and went to live in survivors plan.
Island Majoreros
The second island, the closest to Africa, referred to as Fuerteventura on maps. Mainly populated by foreigners, Galician , goats, squirrels and kangaroos, which have a plot and have achieved their dream of domination, a good example for geeks . Kangaroos remain in disguise as humans to believe the real human they have control of the island. Hutch know about this plot and why there are poor relations between the two islands, war is always won by Warren as they always hear comments on the ferry as "Well, I like my Lancelot," "The roads in Fuerteventura are endless, "or" That site is shit and Fuerteventura are the Majoreras rough. " North of this island, south of the island is Hutch Lobos Island, where kangaroos hold before its transformation into people think they know their plot to dominate the island.
Kangaroos were introduced to the island by the Norman knights Juaneco de Bethencourt, commissioned by the crown Castilla to conquer the island. As everyone knows, the Normans were the last survivors of the Order of the Templars , who agreed to the order of the King of Castile as part of its plan to find a sanctuary in which to mature his plans for revenge and access World Domination. The post-Templar Templar heirs of Master of Normandy Geoffroy de Charney, who voluntarily accompanied the Grand Master to the flames, brought the kangaroos from Normandy (his true place of origin, see History of the Kangaroos ) to ensure control of the island once pass to the Island of the Canary Island to create the Sanhedrin Vegueta the next stage of his plans for world domination. Therefore, one could say that Fuerteventura is the last Templar stronghold in the world, along with Pobedilla and Coslada.
Island Canarión
Third Island and the first of the mountain (though some would argue), also called Gran Canaria , although some outdated Chicharrero fuck you (Don Pepito ), so it is called in some circles as gCanaria or more usually "Las Palmas", so the term can be used, and used, interchangeably for the city, the island and the province. The Canary Island are the provincial capital and co-capital of the autonomous region: Las Palmas de Gran Canaria or Chicharrero QA LPs. The Canary Island are dedicated primarily to visit the other islands and brag about their big shopping centers, their wives, their big car and how big are their penises. The only way to protect yourself is to give the reason (as the crazy) that they live in the most advanced city, metropolitan and cosmopolitan of the universe, after which they run out of conversation.
Canarión
Most have addiction Firgas water or sparkling water (water agurejitos), which is drunk while giving a sense of hallucination. Among its natural attractions is the stump of God (forthcoming reconstruction), and various natural features such as removable Roque Roque del Fraile, or cloudy or cloudy.
also have the rare ability to bind 73% of investment agreements, leaving the other islands in the 3 rd world, apart from feeling a deep envy of the tram to Santa Cruz-La Laguna. To overcome this trauma, have erected a flag insular than 50 meters high, visible from 7,500 miles nautical and used for navigation by canoes and boats of half of Africa.
Gran Canaria has its own plan for domination world articulated by the dreaded Last guanche , which is the power behind the scenes of the island and the entire region. Last is rooted in history as a member of the great race of Granguanch, members of the Masonic Federation Canaries. In turn, the emperor, has its own sub-lieutenant and quarterback: The Sanhedrin. The Sanhedrin was founded in 1483 by the Castilian conquerors from Coslada, skillfully manipulated by the Norman nobles of Fuerteventura, as we saw, were the last descendants of the Templars survived the great slaughter they suffered after the settlement of the Order by the Pope in the fourteenth century. The creation of the council ended the draft postemplarios to find a good place to go unnoticed the following six hundred years to implement his plan for revenge. Since then, with the collaboration of political traitors Chicharrero Tenerife, have dominated the destinies of the region, waiting for his chance. Thanks to its excellent contacts with Freemasonry, the Rosicrucians, Stamp Vendors, the Zionist Conspiracy, Illuminati, the Ku Klux Klan and other secret orders so that only fear and Dan have been treated several times in the TNT television show , approach the next step of his plan: to make the Canary Islands and Gran Canaria in the "Plataforma Logística Tricontinental" Atlantic "bridge between cultures" and "Mid-Atlantic Capital," with what they think to get the springboard out of hiding and start the World Domination.
the Chicharrero Province or "Chicharro"
Officially "Santa Cruz" and called "Santa Cruz de Tenerife" or "Tenerife" by the Goths. The islands are:
Also known as Tenerife . Have the other capital of the archipelago, Santa Cruz, (hereinafter referred to as GC LPs "The Chicharro" a name also used interchangeably for the island and the province), which leads them to be at war with the island shopping of the Canary Island, to see who builds more. For this old conflict, the Sanhedrin sits right Canarión sent them a curse, making evening wear to wake sleepwalkers for infrastructure and thus damage to the rain they are older. The great aspiration is to bring together the chicharreros 73% of investment agreements, leaving the other islands in the 3rd. world. There is also a war of auditing Tenerife and Gran Canaria, which must be added a recent tri-continental war Logistics Platforms and other Southern Railway.
Tenerife campaigners in this unequal battle are members of the Order of Hidalgo de Nivaria, bravely headed by Grand Master Don Pepito . Their existence is almost as old as the Sanhedrin sits right, its mortal enemy. The Order was founded already in the sixteenth century to counter the operations of the council, and had some success keeping Gran Canaria under the boot of a firm grip for centuries, cutting the bud any hint of development in the Third (code name Gran Order Canaria Nivaria of Hidalgo), until the traitor Canary Island, assisted by their allies Judeo-Masonic in Madrid, won the provincial division in 1927, the date from which Nivaria entered into an unstoppable decline. Free from the yoke of the order, members of the council could remove the mask and focus to continue their dark designs.
Since the creation of the Canary Islands in 1982, the balance has continued leaning in favor of Gran Canaria and the Sanhedrin, despite the stubborn defense led by Don Pepito and Hidalgos. Countless offal has since undergone the August Nivaria Maximum Optimal (code name Chicharrolandia in the Order) the most beautiful, large and populous Nivaria Islands, thanks to the cohort of traitors to Tenerife Tenerife money selling yellow, Goths agents infiltrated by the Sanhedrin in the ranks of Chicharro, the media controlled from Gran Canaria, academics and false salary Sanhedrin environmentalists who sabotage the war in shopping centers, logistics platforms and trains from the south, MPs and even members of government favor and shamelessly dote on Gran Canaria, laughing at the tears of rage from the true patriots while carrying briefcases full of black money to Switzerland or the Cayman Islands.
However, the chicharreros I have the consolation of knowing that the FrikiTeide is the highest peak in the world and the foreigner and that is "mah improved" because of this fact, they love to discuss the issue with any entity or be from outside the island, especially the Canary Island. There is no possible protection for it, even if given the reason, no matter, continue to comment how great is the Teide.
has to know which are the most perverted chicharreros island, next to Las Palmas and Lanzarote. Its high sexual intellect is often based on names like: Yaiza, Yanira, Nauzet, Laura, Joseph, Daniel, etc ... these are the names of the most perverted beings normally
island
La Gomera is a small island, populated by Gomerites, which are nothing more than chicharreros who escaped the curse of the Canary Island, at night sleep in La Gomera, to prevent harm them chicharreros, and the day will Chicharrolandia to buy in the malls. It is the place in the world with more orchestras per capita (67 million per 1000 population data disclosed by Sesame Street).
San Borondón
alleged ghost island, more likely to be the Michael Jackson yacht looking blond guy and white children come with parents to make tourism in the Canary Islands, with a preference for Finnish and Hyperborean . It has also been named the destroyer of evil general last Chankete and was seen in the aftermath of the World War.
La Palma
The Palmeritas primarily engaged in preparing the annual festivals of the island, but never arrive on time and usually are delayed four years to have it listed, what really held once every five years. This happens because the Palmeritas have to bear the fatigue of the chicharreros, so just awake from 7:03 to 7:24 and 19:57 to 20:11. In addition to preparing the feasts, in his spare time, growing bananas to make them black spots to advertise them as original and identification. They are the inventors of the mojo thing is that the other islands by their desire for food and too, have taken over the sauce and echo some varieties have degenerated as "Mojo aqueous" in Gran Canaria and the "mojo weird "of the Iron, without a doubt the roots of mojo still valid in this region and therefore have their specialties
Thanks to them, the Canarian culture has been steeped in mojo, and his famous phrases like
"The rich sauce called mojo picon canaria"
-
Andrés Montes ~
palm
The landscape consists mainly of many trees, even more than in the Amazon, in the midst of all the trees and the conduit to the center of the earth (boiler Taburiente) is Idafe Roque (Father of the stump of God) which holds the heaven of this island and the vast majority of islands of the universe, and as is so important to the universe has a feje stars. Dubbed "La Isla Bonita" on February 25, 1987 Madonna Louise Veronica Ciccone Fortin very populeña creates a song that is sung everywhere and is super cool on the island Bonica. Recently
the Palmeritas projects is to keep the lights at night to see the stars, so, from when the sun is no longer in the sky, the street lamps because they are not polluting the sky left oscurisisimas spotless and streets, and thus can attack canis quietly watch a star purr
The Herreritas dominate the last island and are also affected by the curse Canarión. They also work to prepare its annual and, when they are awake, only dedicated to preparing the party. In fact, the years counted holidays. The party is to take a virgin all over the island as people dirty linen on the floor while dancing to the Iron giant lizards and so go see them hunt and eat: this makes different people fight over the road that must pass the virgin. For this reason, the annual festival is delayed three years, and has just celebrated four.
islands map
map of the islands, according to the Goths.
Folklore
For music, folklore canario timple mainly used, which later majoreros kangaroos adapt it to them, making it larger in size and adding a rope. The new instrument was called guitar, creating genuine Fuerteventura.
I ANGUAGE
> SEE THE DICTIONARY IS RECOMMENDED FOR FURTHER CLARIFICATIONS CANARIO
--- Canaries have changed the English, so that the Goths despair when talking to them. Basically, each island has a rare bastente intonation.
Thus, typical Canarian phrases are:
- `t No alongueh the parapet you fall and ehnuncar Vaha.
- That `hta rich with aseitas gofio and ASUC (gCanaria) / with cohtillah (Chicharro).
- The terms mah mojo picon better.
- Chaaaaacho, ehtate still, I give you and I broke your Josico.
- Ay Mama! San Miguel encimba and mijijah disñúah. (Chicharrerolandia)
- you what gross qun `mah ereh guillemot
- Jasuh, jose nursing and either take the bus!
- Hahlo it right, do not be my gum!
- Noh, who Pressio !!!!( powe network by Hiperdino)
- the ohhtia Shias, bichillo
- "What are you doing there with that Bubang toa escarranchá in verija?!
- What fucking pussy and eta loooco?!
- My wand? Large Mu, grasias.
- Fua! Coñeeee! The guaguaaaaaa!
- Er Manolete? Large Mu, grasias!
- What hablah Manolete, chacho?
- 'll be fool! I do not talk like that!
- Chacho my Neno, potato boot arrejúntate er package here with me on the bus.
- alongeh to barrancoh Never thought you craggy.
Normally, the Canaries normal speaking, but one day is a day (yes pussy, I'm Canario).
more about the language:
Oh, what happened?
English Canary
speakest
Tourist Attractions
At the foot of the Teide are played every 2 hours
Japanese duels
Teide
The auditorium of Tenerife
The highest peak of all universal platagrafía. It was formed by the debris removed from the Caldera (La Palma) and Los Palmeritas not want all that land to nada.A his side, Mount Olympus is a turd. Esc only been winged by Jesus
Calleja, others who have tried have died attack by a yeti.
For Expica Teide training with a very simple example:
La Caldera (Represented by an ass, that is, two buttocks and scrotum) ejected out a series of gas and liquid and solid elements (Shit shit) which is thrown to the central part of Tenerife (The Boxer). This theory is called "Theory of shit shorts."
The finger of God before becoming a stump
Chicharrolandia Auditorium
The real boiler
Taburiente
IS NOT REALLY AN AUDITORIUM. It's a UFO, but currently leased to a satanic cult. This sect are old and beautiful messages such as the Canary Island stop, drink Pepsi instead of Coca-Cola and reach the summit of Teide at least once in their life (only one conseguedio parishioners has such a feat). It is believed that the UFO 3060 engines will be loaded back of antimatter and it might take off to wipe out the last traces of life on the planet (if the programs the heart does not advance them.) The ship will be commanded by Hestevienen Bethlehem, known for its enigmatic appearances on the island.
God stump
is the weapon of the Canarión against chicharrolandia auditorium. It's actually a missile platform M - 30, which can cause mental jams all you can think of looking at the island. After a violent storm (the storm ferpecto of DELTA, a shadowy organization whose aim is to establish the spicy mojo sauce as the main food of the Earth), Finger of God (code name for the project) was terribly amputee, becoming the stump. Some experts have tried to repair this powerful weapon Poxipol droplet, although so far the results have not been successful ... Thus was created the plan B. The stump of God will be a weapon capable of creating holes in space time to absorb the surrounding islands at a gala Drag Queen. Completion is expected this project for the year Pi.
Timanfaya
Hutch Located on the island is a volcano vomiting with intestinal problems. It is now a national park, but fought hard against the house of Chiquito de la Calzada to achieve this coveted title. The vegetation grows naturally, therefore, every Friday night throughout the park is burned so that it retains the name of national park across the street from that piece fistro.
La Caldera
say the ancient people of Palm Island that the Caldera was the heat with which he showered Taburiente, English and English who came to investigate the geography of island is given by putting the name calling of the boiler which said it had a boiler. Actually it is the only place on earth to get into the planetary interior of the earth, the Berne Julito vacaiones came about and I copied the life of Manolo was a travel day pa boiler, since then it Julito I usually come to La Palma to copy stories from the elderly and removed a peel. Today, if it is going to have to make a boiler kicked in 19 days and 500 nights (also the song that Sabina) so only in the last 30 years has entered the King and Queen of Spain as particular helicopter.
Garajonay
Gara's story and Jonathan is a fucking asshole beautiful Guanche legend. Gara was a beautiful princess from La Gomera Jonathan who fell in love, a prince, son of a king of Tenerife. Jonathan swam a goatskin inflated from Tenerife to La Gomera, to meet his beloved mother and flee. But parents of the couple were frightened Teide bad omens of smoking, for that suited her fatal Malboro, strongly objected to the relationship between penguins and sea lions. Gara and Jonay fled, then, the highest mountain in the island, to where they were persecuted. Finding himself cornered, sharpened a stick at both ends and stop resting on their chests, hugged each other to die pierced by wood. Today that mountain is named after Garajonay, in memory of those young people who chose to call the U.S. ejrecito to attack with his F18 to Aborigines. Canari
@ s famous
As there where people there who gives more singing, and as there would be less the Canary Islands had celebrities: [ asshole players also exist in Canary ]
César Manrique
Warren obsessed with white, which houses the desire of the hutches are white, unless owners do not give them the win, although the council say that only allow white. His works, like many other artists belong to the style "xDDDDD I paint that picture for my nephew 3 years, te'e'engañao!".
Pepe Damaso
sculptor, painter and artist in general. A man on the Guanche spirit flows, and is as canary, as canary, as canary, which does not send Christmas cards, but christmast. Stamp Collecting Canarias 7 newspaper can get some work of this artist, also belonging to the lo-style paint-my-nephew.
Lidia Lozano
After this being with the ability to launch lazaro + and looking to be come from hell, the part where the sun squeezed more, and crack rocks from the sun, lies a Palmerita , which, as you enjoy a daily show dwarfs grown, he feels the need to return every four years on the island that was given life itself, which it
Manolo Blahnik
Our beloved and famous creator of atrecho of "Sex and the City" is this gentleman, who after one season to the London money lining up the bars, you ever feel desire for their land ( La Palma) and returns to her relatives to rub their bank accounts full of money from the likes of Madonna and other aliens.
Dimas Martín
endearing corrupt politician, and his fellow guild marbellís like to live in the shade. In 2072 will meet in a maximum security prison with others in your same situation. Incarcerated for crimes that say they have not invested , they will soon escape from the prison where they will be held. While being pursued by the government, will survive as political fortune, if you have any problem and are found, you could bribe them.
professional bocce player, but in his spare time practicing furbo Frenando and elongation of Verdasco born in Las Palmas, central defender currently supermarkets Mercadona and Jeré (provided by the unsportsmanlike . bestiajo notable for being a forceful, especially in the passing game. Without doubt, the best defense that has given the Canary Islands to furbo aspañol .
Other professional bocce player, although it entered the furbo by fellow canary threatened with death if not go to the bathroom and girls together to play in the Aspan Peninsula. Peter is owned by the Barceló FC , but enjoys being one of the infiltrators of the CCOO case someone is out of line of cocaine. Also known as the Chico Chico miracles or gold , Tenerife is always a mark in the important moments, that is, during the breaks.
Raquel del Rosario
This musical musicologist born in Gran Canaria, is a clear example of Canarian culture, always so cross with his voice and his "lisp" which sweetens life Goths, day by day ... more nothing because they are soset ..
To learn more about it click here: Raquel del Rosario
prostitute known singer in the Canary Islands, who shot to fame with its juices inerease hips ability as a singer. Often hold concerts in festivals and guateques several, wandering through all the islands in search of work encouraging people. It's very nice to your audience (consisting of 95% for women over 75 years), and does not hesitate to perform oral sex sign autographs for people who ask him. It is also common for parties and cenemonias
Cani